So, as you can see, this post is ridiculously late. I was under the impression that I had posted my blog on the designated Sunday. I woke up on Sunday, wrote a short passage, copied it to the blog typing space thingy, and...well I am not sure what I did. I am assuming that I did not hit post, but instead just hit the red x in the corner of the web browser and went on to do whatever it is I do with my time. Until today, when I decided to do some "productive procrastination" by reading the blog, I thought my post was up for all to see. Little did I know that when Laura said "a few of you had forgotten to post" she was referring to me. Well, here is my post, for whatever it is worth:
After reading Kolln's chapter 9, I decided to evaluate my use of adverbial prepositional phrases. As Kolln points out, my use of prepositional phrases is sometimes unnecessary and confusing.
Old Version:
The fictional autobiography aims to have an immediate impact on the reader by dealing with a real person in a fictional disguise. The proletarian initiation novel takes a naïve protagonist into the utopian world of communism that is preferrrable. Proletarian social novels delineate both labor woes of the common worker and shows how the lowest classes of society lives in a day to day basis.
In this version, my use of prepositonal phrases obscure the focus of the sentences and makes my writing difficult to understand. In order to alleviate this problem, I replaced these phrases with prenoun modifiers.
New Version:
The fictional autobiography aims to immediately impact the reader by dealing with a fictionally disguised real person. The proletarian initiation novel takes a naive protagonist into the prefferable communist utopian world. Proletarain social novels delineate both labor woes of the common worker and reveals the day to day lives of the lowest class of society.
Changing the prepositional phrases to prenoun modifiers makes my writing a little more focused and a lot less confusing.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
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