Oops. I forgot, too.

BEFORE: The period spanning the Victorian Era and the early part of the Jazz Age was brief in historic terms: roughly eighty years. These decades represent, however, an epic shift in women’s self-perception: from that of passive dependents who responded and adapted to events in life, to strong beings who seized opportunities and set events into motion. Considering that America is a “self-made” country, it is fitting that this shift to a more “Self-Made” Woman took place on American soil, with inspiration coming from vastly different women: as different as Irish domestic workers and upper middle-class “New Women.” …

The first sentence shows the proper use of a colon in following a complete sentence. Considering that I use three colons in this paragraph, however, the first sentence begs for revision. This sentence also contains a pronoun modifier that is modified with an –ly adverb. I’ve used these modifiers properly—without a hyphen—but the sentence is clumsy. The second sentence also poses a problem by containing nine prepositional phrases that obscure the focus of the paragraph. Kolln suggests turning some of these prepositional phrases into pronoun modifiers or more precise words.

AFTER: Women’s self-perception dramatically shifted during the period spanning the Victorian Era and the early part of the Jazz Age. During this time, passive and reactive women embraced opportunities for self-motivated action. These “Self-Made” Women were as diverse as the American melting pot: as different as Irish domestic workers and upper middle-class “New Women.” …